Radio Free EuropeR.E.M.
MurmurI.R.S. Records : 1983
[
Listen] [
Buy]
Get Up
R.E.M.
Green
Warner Bros. : 1988
[Listen] [Buy]
These Days
R.E.M.
Lifes Rich Pageant
I.R.S. Records : 1986
[Listen] [Buy]
Star Me Kitten
R.E.M.
Automatic for the People
Warner Bros. : 1992
[Listen] [Buy]
Time After Time [Annelise]
R.E.M.
Reckoning
I.R.S. Records : 1984
[Listen] [Buy]
Country Feedback
R.E.M.
Out Of Time
Warner Bros. : 1991
[Listen] [Buy]
Parakeet
R.E.M.
Up
Warner Bros. : 1998
[Listen] [Buy]
E-Bow the Letter
R.E.M.
New Adventures in Hi-Fi
Warner Bros. : 1996
[Listen] [Buy]
1,000,000
R.E.M.
Chronic Town EP
I.R.S. Records : 1982
[Listen]
It’s a cool afternoon. July, 2006. I’m sitting inside, trying to figure out how and what I’m going to write about R.E.M. for my FMGT guest spot. Pressure. The kid we pay to mow our lawn knocks on the door. “Mind if I wash my hands?” Well, not really a kid. 18. A month away from college. “So is, like, R.E.M. your favorite band?”
“What?”
My shirt. I’m wearing an R.E.M. shirt, from their ’95 world tour. Not as if I was there – I was only 13 at the time. Bought it at Ames with 4 other R.E.M. shirts. Each out of date, each 4 bucks. There were only a handful there and I never understood how or why they had them.
“So, is like, R.E.M. your favorite band?”
Wood paneling. 1993. Dad and I are playing “World Class Leader Board Golf” on my computer. We nod our heads between EGA fairway drives to “Radio Free Europe”. Slapping my knees, tapping my feet, the song is formatted and written into permanent memory. It is his tape, but it is fated never to leave my collection.
I realize standing there in my pitifully stretched and tattered R.E.M. shirt that I have no idea how to answer that question, in the same way that I have no idea how to write my guest spot. I mean, it’s not as if I’m covering an underground act whose relationship with the world is an either/or: known or unknown. This is a group who’s been putting out singles almost as long as I’ve been alive. Then who is the audience I’m writing for?
Christmas day, 1994. R.E.M.’s Green, freshly opened and looping endless in my tape deck. I page through the instruction manual for “Microsoft Flight Simulator 5.0”, waiting to be prompted for the next in a line of installation diskettes. Track 2, “Get Up”, and I’m bouncing in my chair, tossing back my head, wishing I already knew the words.
Should I do a brief write-up on the band’s history? Do I talk about the band’s formation, their years kicking around Athens? Do I focus on the characters involved, Mike, Michael, Peter, and Bill, bringing into focus the personalities that formed and influenced decades of music? The obsession with punk rock? Patti Smith? Their almost name, Cans of Piss?
Summer 1998. “These Days” on the CD-Rom, over and over. With a blue Squire Jazz Bass around my neck, I struggle to keep up with Mike, Bill, and Peter. Fingers fumbling over each other, I fail and fail again. Stop. Back. Play. Blisters on my fingers, cramps in my hands, I must some day learn to play like this.
Do I focus more on their progression as a band? Their early college radio success? Their musical progression through each album? Their rise to stardom and signing with Warner Brothers? Their record breaking $80 Million dollar deal just 8 years later? Their perilous ’95 world tour? The departure of their drummer Bill Berry? The qualities of their much debated work since?
Headphones and bedsheets, 1996. “Star Me Kitten” Rewind and play, rewind and play. I have no words for what I hear. Beauty and darkness, a goddess glowing in a floodlight, smooth and misty, unspeakable. I close my eyes. Is anybody else hearing this? Will anyone else understand the tender kneading plea “fuck me kitten?”
Everyone’s heard “It’s the End of the World as We Know It” and “Losing My Religion” and “One I Love and “Shiny Happy People”. And of course there are dozens of others that have hit the radios but didn’t make huge waves which may or may not be familiar with the average person. And then there’s oddities like “Nightswimming” which practically everyone I knew in college had on their hard drives, yet was never released as a single.
Hotel balcony, 1995. My feet kicked up on the railing and my chair leaned back against the wall, I sit overlooking a yellow empty parking lot. I came out to decide if I should break up with my girlfriend or not. My walkman hums between my hands, tucked safely in my sweatshirt pocket, winding down side A of Reckoning. Underneath the music I can hear the Atlantic Ocean and the salt water breeze that cuts across my face. The truth sets on me slow but clear: there are no problems here to find, no other place to be.
So do I pull from the hits most people know? They’re all great songs. Do I try to pull from songs I know never hit the radio, while skipping over some gems? Do I dig out live or obscure B-Sides, which are always fun but don’t represent the band at their best? Do I pull one song from each album?
The moon, 1997, from a bus window. My walkman died two hours ago. The girl I’m in love with, the seat in front of me, leans on her boyfriend. She has no idea. They have no idea; no one does. No one hears it, in the static and voices, the diesel drone. My walkman died two hours ago, but the song never stopped. Through the bus window, to the moon, I mouth the words. No one hears it. “Country Feedback.”
No, not enough space for that. And it’s not as if I can just pick favorites either. There would be too many. Maybe only cover early R.E.M.: the IRS years before they signed to Warner Brothers. But that leaves out a lot of great material too.
Gravel road, 1999. The car’s off, but the last song played, “Parakeet” still lingers. Idle easy conversation and I recline my seat. The body next to mine, on my mind the long drive here now seems distant, abstract. A figure like the ridges that define our sky. Words drift by and I think of the radio waves slipping through us. Breath collects on glass and I look but can’t see satellites slide by, silent, blinking.
To hell with it. What I’ll do is pick a handful of tracks that’s both important to me personally and that I feel represent R.E.M. at their best, then I’ll write little narratives about each. That should work well.
Diner booth, 1997. We split a two song play on our booth’s juke box. I can’t believe they had “E-Bow the Letter” and I have to play it. I wait anxiously for the downbeat, for my friends to hear the richness, the layers, the genius that I’m sure is universally recognizable, that’s been driving me crazy since I heard it first. It doesn’t work out that way. One uninterested, the other jibes: “what’s the title of this song, ‘Slow, Painful Death?’” I learn my first lesson, quiet, defeated, about audiences.
Oh, and I can even break it up and intersperse them into some larger narrative about how hard it is to condense the band down and explain it, or my relationship to it, easily. Then I can bookend it, like some crappy creative writing exercise from school or something. Yeah. That just might work.
My bedroom, summer, 199?. Fast, moving, clean and jangley, “1,000,000” from their first release, and EP called Chronic Town. 1982, and I’m not even a year old yet. No one I know has listened to this. No one knows. Listen to these guys. I imagine large square cars, a train rolling through their town, boxcars, all on grainy faded film. They have no idea the journey they’re about to take. No one I know is listening to this. They have no idea. The journey they’re about to take and they have no idea.
“So, is like, R.E.M. your favorite band?”
The kid who mows our lawn points to my shirt with one hand and lifts a bottle of water to her mouth with the other. I forgot: not a kid, really. As she drinks, eyeing me, I answer.
“Yes.” I say. “Well, no. I mean, it’s hard to say. I mean, well, sure. Maybe. Yes."
- Roy Miller.
Roy Miller is, among other things, a writer, a musician,
an assistant manager, single, in debt, a Taco Bell addict,
male, and a resident of the state of Pennsylvania.
He hopes to some day do something that's pretty cool,
but not so cool as to take away hope that there are other
cool things left yet still to do. He recently shaved his head,
so if you see him around, tell him he's looking good.
He likes that.
Check out his take on They Might Be Giants for FmGT here.